Everything else news memes
Page 2 of the best everything else news memes from Jester, made fresh daily from real everything else stories. Tap any meme to read the take and the story behind it.
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Her phone's silent mode is basically a personality trait at this point.
Finally, a tasting menu that pairs each micro-course with a micro-paycheck.
The only thing more committed to this wedding than the bride is the venue's non-refundable deposit.
In grief, holidays become milestones of absence, not celebration.
The real flex is dropping a car payment on teeth and finally having a reason to use them.
A Hall-of-Fame tackle can move 300-pound linemen, but a 94-year-old mum asking about a vacuum? That's the real stiffest test.
When the news channel's own signal fades, the story becomes the silence.
The only thing more welcoming than a pool party is a president who knows the way to a freshman's heart is through free snacks and a cannonball.
The only thing more satisfying than decluttering is watching someone else do it and get rich.
The Friemels took 'land back' literally — 115 years of keeping it in the family, now keeping it for everyone.
Who needs a personal trainer when you've got a 22-year-old with Down syndrome showing us all how it's done?
Nothing says holiday spirit like panic-buying a tiny door calendar six months early so you can feel superior to everyone in December.
Mitsubishi finally remembered SUVs exist, 20 years after everyone else did — it's like showing up to the group chat with a meme from 2005.
Politicians see a herd of donors and think 'dairy farm', not 'constituency'.
The charges mark another step in the effort to curb drug trafficking in the community.
The only thing stronger than the coffee here is the résumé-building.
When Dad said 'don't give me your liver,' he forgot that sons are professional at not listening.
Most 13-year-olds are selling lemonade; Andy's out here with a 3D-printed side hustle that actually helps people.
A quiet loss that reminds us of the giants who built the sport.
The reopening brings relief, but the day's rhythm remains disrupted.
The real peace deal: everyone agrees the toilet paper shortage is the true crisis.
Some reunions take a lifetime to schedule, but this one's finally on the books.
I've upgraded from hand warmer to full-blown bootlegger, and my prize is purple-tinted regret.
Finally, a roommate who brings the exact same amount of urgency to the morning commute as I do.
When your dog's emotional support is so strong, the hospital writes you a pass to go pet him.
The lightbulb pulling a Phoenix while my electricity bill pulls a Lazarus — only one of them is getting resurrected on my dime.
The only retirement plan these lucky cows ever dreamed of was a really big pasture.
The sea gives no second chances; lifeguards are all that stand between a swimmer and tragedy.
Arby's is out here acting like mixing Sprite with cough syrup is a culinary breakthrough.
Teachers' Day is cute until you remember they grade our 'creativity' with a rubric.
The most dangerous mask a man wears is the one he shows the world.
At 16, she's already co-authoring papers — meanwhile, I'm pretty sure my high school self would have co-authored a nap.
The only people in Kansas who can be trusted with a school lunch program are the ones already locked up.
A friend in Canada is worth two thousand miles of tea leaves.
Breaking: Sky Sports presenter spotted walking to the coffee machine—record-breaking £50m move to the 'pundit's chair' expected to be confirmed by the half-time whistle.
David spent $2,000 on flowers and fences — the cheapest way to buy an entire neighborhood's pride.
Wu just learned what the rest of us find out daily: AI will confidently ruin your life, then apologize like it's a software update.
At 81, she's out here living the 'happy little accidents' dream while I can't even finish a coloring book.
The only thing more surprising than a Labor Day article about autism is that Forbes remembered it's not just about barbecues.
A single incident on a major artery halts thousands of lives, a stark reminder of our fragile reliance on the roads.
She really thought the ink would be more permanent than his ick.
Every level crossing without proper safeguards is a tragedy waiting to happen.
Seventeen fridges and they still can't keep them stocked — Richmond's giving away free food so fast it's basically a drive-thru for kindness.
Two seniors just learned that the only thing more invisible than her injury is their self-awareness.
The Met Office announces sun like my ex announces they're moving on—right after I've cancelled my plans.
When he said he was bad with numbers, I didn't realize he meant my phone number too.
The tenant discovered the landlord's secret weapon: selective ownership — now if only the deposit could also not be his.
Congrats, ladies — your fertility is now a fixed-rate mortgage with a 40-year term and no early redemption.
Two hundred spin cycles, zero overdue fines.
Every service worker has seen things that would make a therapist bill by the hour.
Birmingham's forecast is just a moody ex that can't decide if it's breaking up or asking for a second date.
The MILF brought guns to a paperwork fight and still lost.
We've optimized face muscles to do the work our thumbs could do in a nanosecond — evolution really said 'let's downgrade'.
Dreams do come true, especially when the city chips in the deposit.
Finally, first responders who show up with s'mores instead of sandbags.
Most insane coworker is a title you don't win, it's a burden you inherit when the bar is porn at half volume.
A micro shelter that's faster to build than a Toronto condo's paperwork.
He showed up with a camera and a law degree from YouTube, and she still gave him a masterclass in verbal self-defense.
Mom's love language is apparently 'cash app me dad's death payout so I can redo the kitchen.'
A moment of collective mourning for a beloved figure.