The best news memes of Week 40, 2026

The week's biggest stories, as memes — with the takes people actually shared. 40 keepers.

Business

finally, a private-equity role where you don't even have to lie about the carry.

Spoonfuls of sugar: $280,000 nannies for the ultra-rich are in high demand

Nanny salaries for ultra-wealthy families have surged to $280,000 annually, matching professional-level compensation for private-equity roles. Elite agencies report massive demand for candidates with advanced degrees, multilingual skills, and luxury travel experience. The market has shifted from traditional childcare to a high-end service sector where nannies manage the children of the global elite alongside massive household staffs.

Sydney Morning Herald · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

una bici humana que salió más parecida a un humano haciendo bici

Recrean una bicicleta humana por el Día Mundial Sin Auto y sale todo menos una bici

Para el Día Mundial Sin Auto, el Municipio de Aguascalientes organizó 'Súbete a la Bici' en la Plaza Principal y formó una bicicleta humana con cientos de participantes de pie. La escalinata y la fuente arruinaron la foto aérea, y la silueta resultante, con sus luces azules, pareció cualquier cosa menos un velocípedo. Los ciclistas cerraron con una Rodada Nocturna.

El Deforma · Sep 28, 2026

Sports

Zidane's real system: bore them stiff, then unleash the bench.

Olise untangles a poor France performance against Belgium

Bayern winger Michael Olise came off the bench in the second half and scored the only goal in France's 1-0 win over Belgium, a laboured match for Zinedine Zidane's side. France struggled for long stretches before Olise's 0-1 settled it.

El País · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

ya sabemos quién va a palidecer en 2092

Time traveler says nobody in the future admits to having 'farmed aura'

Un supuesto viajero del tiempo afirma haber llegado al año 2092 con una máquina hecha de un microondas, tres controles de Switch y una copia de Age of Empires, y reporta que la expresión "farmear aura" desapareció por completo. Una persona de 60 años palideció cuando le preguntó al respecto, y nadie admitió haber escuchado corridos tumbados, hecho trends o participado en retos virales, aunque sí aceptaron haber hecho movimientos de Fortnite y haber visto Shrek 20 veces. El viajero recomendó cuidar las publicaciones actuales porque cualquier captura de pantalla podría convertirse en evidencia en 60 años.

El Deforma · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

they finished with 9 seconds left and spent a month practising.

California duo set Lego World Map record in under 5 hours

Athena Leong and Sevy Swift assembled all 11,695 pieces of the Lego World Map in 4 hours, 59 minutes and 51 seconds at Brick by Brick Toys in Hayward, California, on April 12, beating the 5 hour 30 minute target Guinness set. The pair practised for a month beforehand and completed the largest commercially available 2D Lego set with 9 seconds to spare. They credited sorting by colour and saving the most colour-matched pieces for last.

UPI Odd News · Sep 28, 2026

Everything else

A commute of 300 kilometres and the class still starts on time. Some people just don't do excuses.

Far from home, teachers keep classes going on Pagasa Island

Teachers stationed on Pagasa Island, part of the Kalayaan island group in the Spratly Islands, hold daily classes despite being about 480 kilometres from Puerto Princesa, Palawan. The school serves children of residents and personnel on the remote outpost, and instruction continues through the school year. The Department of Education supports the teachers with supplies and transport, and officials cite the classes as proof that public education reaches even the country's farthest frontier.

Palawan News · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

Alan Cumming's job is Nightcrawler, not script supervisor. He's here to blue himself and vibe.

Alan Cumming Says He Doesn't Understand the 'Avengers: Doomsday' Plot

Alan Cumming, returning as Nightcrawler in Avengers: Doomsday after 23 years, told SiriusXM he doesn't fully understand the film's plot and was never given the full screenplay. During one backlot scene, when a crew member began explaining that giant robots were doing something or other, Cumming cut him off: just tell me where to point and I'll do it, because he knows he's mainly there to run around. He also told Florence Pugh at the Emmys that her body double lay on top of him — she corrected him that it was his body double. The film opens December 18.

Variety · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

Fei-Fei Li is now AMD's chief scientist, which is the first time 'chief scientist' has ever been a demotion from 'Stanford professor'.

AMD buying Fei-Fei Li's World Labs in $8.2 billion all-stock deal

AMD agreed on Monday to acquire World Labs, the San Francisco AI lab founded by Stanford researcher Fei-Fei Li, in an all-stock deal worth about $8.2 billion. Li becomes AMD's chief scientist and an executive vice president, and World Labs stays separate from the chipmaking business until the transaction closes later this year. It is AMD's second-largest purchase ever, after the roughly $50 billion Xilinx deal in 2022, as chipmakers race to buy AI research talent.

CNBC · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

they skipped the entire relationship and went straight to a joint bank account

Is Attakathi Dinesh Dating VJ Ezhilarasi? Viral Birthday Post Confirms Romance

A birthday post by Tamil actor Attakathi Dinesh for VJ Ezhilarasi set off dating rumours after fans read romantic intent into the caption. Neither Dinesh nor Ezhilarasi has confirmed or denied a relationship. The post went viral within hours, with comment sections and entertainment pages treating the caption as a de facto relationship announcement. Both remain active on social media and have not addressed the speculation.

LatestLY · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

a vanguard goes first.

Dave Grohl and Jordyn Blum Attend VMAs Together 2 Years After Cheating Scandal

Dave Grohl and Jordyn Blum attended the MTV Video Music Awards together on Sunday at Los Angeles' Peacock Theater, their first major red-carpet appearance since Grohl revealed in September 2024 that he had fathered a daughter outside their marriage. The couple matched in all black. Grohl, 57, took the stage with Nirvana bandmates Krist Novoselic and Pat Smear to accept the Video Vanguard Award, and the trio paid tribute to Kurt Cobain, who died in 1994.

Page Six · Sep 28, 2026

Business

Bob Chapek spent three years trying to run Disney just so he could eventually write a 272-page LinkedIn post about why it’s not his fault.

Bob Chapek's Tell-All Memoir Blames Bob Iger for His Failed Disney Tenure

Former Disney CEO Bob Chapek is releasing his memoir, "Behind the Castle Walls," on September 29. In the book, Chapek accuses his predecessor and successor, Bob Iger, of orchestrating a campaign to undermine his leadership. Chapek claims he was unfairly dismissed in November 2022 and denies that his tenure was defined by personal mistakes.

Variety · Sep 28, 2026

Science

eleven thousand satellites and the wifi still dies the second it rains

SpaceX launches its massive Starship rocket into orbit for the first time

SpaceX launched its Starship rocket into orbit for the first time on Monday from its Starbase, Texas facility, with the vehicle reaching orbit around 8:15 a.m. local time on its 14th test flight. The booster made a soft splashdown off the coast while the ship deployed 26 Starlink V3 satellites. SpaceX, now valued near $2 trillion after June's record IPO, operates roughly 11,000 active satellites versus about 650 for Eutelsat OneWeb.

CNBC · Sep 28, 2026

Science

it splashed down. the reusability was the explosion.

SpaceX's Starship reaches Earth orbit for the first time, then explodes on splashdown

SpaceX's Starship reached Earth orbit for the first time on Monday, hitting about 300 kilometres altitude during the fourteenth test flight, launched from Starbase in Texas. The flight lasted just over three hours instead of the planned ten after multiple engine failures, and the vehicle exploded during splashdown in the Pacific. SpaceX has spent roughly $15 billion on the program, which Elon Musk has pitched for crewed Moon and Mars missions.

El Mundo · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

two people looked at each other and the internet wrote a trilogy.

Dakota Johnson Addresses Machine Gun Kelly Dating Rumors After Pair Sparks Romance Buzz

Dakota Johnson addressed rumors that she is dating Machine Gun Kelly after the two were spotted together and romance speculation spread online. The actress responded to the buzz with a characteristically vague non-answer, declining to confirm or deny anything. Neither party has offered specifics about the nature of their relationship, and no timeline or details have been made public.

Business Upturn · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

Hungary issued DJN-623 to a hero vehicle. the DMV still thinks it's a bus.

This guy's 1976 VW bus became a Matchbox toy, with his real license plate

Dávid Sipos owns a 1976 Volkswagen T2 bus that appeared as a hero vehicle in "Matchbox: The Movie." Matchbox later released a miniature of the bus, and Sipos noticed the model carries his actual Hungarian license plate, DJN-623, which never appears in the film. He documented the story online, including a photo of the bus beside its original owner, who took delivery in 1976 and now holds the toy version.

BoingBoing · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

the stock market crashed because a woman's eyes moved 4 degrees

Charli XCX Blinked Near Taylor Swift at the VMAs and Both Fandoms Declared War

A clip from the 2026 VMAs appearing to show Charli XCX glancing in Taylor Swift's direction went viral, with fans on both sides reading hostility into a moment lasting under two seconds. Neither artist has commented. The speculation has revived the long-running feud narrative between the two fanbases, which has been dormant since their 2024 collaboration on the remix of 'Sympathy Is a Knife.'

Indiatimes · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

Bumpy treats 'cuddled to sleep' not as a phase but as a permanent care plan.

Days-old hippo 'Bumpy' given second chance at wildlife sanctuary: 'He sleeps most soundly when cuddled'

Kenya Wildlife Service rescuers found a days-old orphaned hippo beside his dead mother in Naivasha on May 2, 2026 and drove him to Nairobi. Keepers at the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust's nursery fed him warm milk, wrapped him in a cherry red blanket, and slept with him on the floor; he is now five months old at the Kaluku Unit near the Athi River and was adopted as a little brother by a rhino named Korbessa. He is expected to return to the wild in Tsavo.

Good Good Good · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

the only thing confirmed is the rumor economy.

Where Did the Rumors That Michael B. Jordan and Raye Were a Couple Start?

Showbiz Cheat Sheet traced the origins of speculation that actor Michael B. Jordan and British singer Raye are dating, a claim neither party has confirmed. The rumors spread through fan posts and social media chatter rather than any verified sighting, statement, or announcement. The outlet could not identify a single concrete event that started the story, only recycled internet speculation.

Showbiz Cheat Sheet · Sep 28, 2026

Sports

the ball was the only one not getting fined for the fight

Jaguars' Josh Hines-Allen Going Viral for Weird Sideline Altercation Over Game Ball

Jacksonville Jaguars edge rusher Josh Hines-Allen was caught on camera in a bizarre sideline confrontation over a football during Sunday's game. The viral clip shows Hines-Allen grabbing at the ball as a teammate or staffer tried to pull it away, with both men yanking at it before cooler heads stepped in. The team has not commented on what sparked the tug-of-war, and the footage has circulated widely online.

heavy.com · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

They banned AI from peer review. 22.5% of reviewers used it anyway — and the acceptance rate moved 0.5 points.

Scientists can't stop using AI, even when forbidden from doing so

Microsoft Research ran a randomised experiment at ICML 2026 in Seoul, where 24,661 papers were reviewed by 17,886 reviewers split between a policy banning LLMs from review and a permissive one allowing LLMs for understanding papers and polishing writing but not judging merit. Acceptance rates came out 27 per cent under the ban and 26.5 per cent under the permissive policy, with average scores of 3.31 and 3.32 out of 6. An anonymous survey of 1,486 reviewers found 22.5 per cent of those told not to use AI had used an LLM anyway.

New Scientist · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

first safety team to get laid off wins.

AI companies in fierce arms race to demonstrate their model is the most existentially threatening to humanity

AI labs are now competing to prove their model poses the greatest existential risk, turning doom into a marketing pitch. The escalation is the point: each release implies the last one was too safe to be taken seriously. No benchmark, no paper, no safety framework — just vibes, press cycles and a leaderboard nobody asked for. Investors reward the threat; regulators get a press release and a shrug.

r/nottheonion · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

A software dev with no math degree cracked a 3D shape mathematicians spent decades dreading to visualise — using a chatbot.

AI finds 3D shape that fills all space with a never-repeating pattern

Software developer Ioannis Tsiokos, who has no mathematics background, used OpenAI's GPT-6 Astra model to discover Chair44, a 3D aperiodic monotile — a shape that tiles three-dimensional space forever without ever repeating a pattern. He fed the model the underlying theory, theorems and Lean code, and the AI also drafted the paper describing the find. Craig Kaplan of the University of Waterloo calls the shape a valid solution but says the paper has the usual clarity problems of AI-generated mathematics; Chaim Goodman-Strauss of the University of Arkansas called it "basically a piece of slop." The 2023 2D "hat" tile had already appeared in engineering and chemistry research.

New Scientist · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

Zuck's big enterprise plan: make the AI that already lives in your group chat start sending invoices.

Meta launches enterprise AI platform, hires MongoDB CEO to lead new initiative

Meta announced Monday it is launching the Meta Enterprise Platform, an AI business unit led by newly hired Chirantan "CJ" Desai, the CEO of MongoDB. The platform will sell Meta's AI stack — including its Muse assistant, Meta Business Agent, Muse API and Muse Code — to companies and developers. MongoDB's shares fell more than 17 percent on Desai's sudden exit; the board named former CEO Dev Ittycheria as interim chief while it searches for a permanent replacement.

TechCrunch · Sep 28, 2026

Sports

the catch: he has to actually wear the shoes.

Tom Brady ditches Nike for a brand 20 times smaller, and the deal has a weird condition

Tom Brady has signed an endorsement deal with a sportswear brand roughly twenty times smaller than Nike, the company he previously represented. The arrangement reportedly includes an unusual contractual condition attached to the money, a wrinkle that distinguished the offer from a standard athlete endorsement. Brady, who spent two decades as the face of Nike's football marketing, now fronts a challenger label in a deal whose terms have not been fully disclosed.

The Economic Times · Sep 28, 2026

Science

the man who couldn't predict the microwave has thoughts on GPT

Scary Nostradamus Prophecy Surfaces Just As Scientists Warn About AI Becoming More Dangerous

A prophecy attributed to 16th-century French astrologer Nostradamus, written in 1555, has resurfaced online and is being read as a warning about artificial intelligence, as experts raise fresh concerns over rapid AI progress. The quatrains are famously vague and have been retrofitted to predict centuries of events after the fact. No specific AI system, date or mechanism is named in the text.

Bored Panda · Sep 28, 2026

Sports

Giants traded for a QB because Jaxson Dart got hurt. Their starter got sacked by his own name.

Giants acquire QB J.J. McCarthy in trade with Vikings

The New York Giants acquired quarterback J.J. McCarthy from the Minnesota Vikings in a trade, according to multiple reports. The move follows an injury to Giants QB Jaxson Dart and gives McCarthy, who was buried on Minnesota's depth chart behind Sam Darnold, a fresh opportunity to start. The Vikings recoup return compensation in the deal.

ESPN · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

we gave grown men go-karts and a mountain and nobody's calling it the stupidest sport on earth, which it clearly is

Real-Life Mario Kart Race Down an Austrian Mountain

Sam Pilgrim, a professional freeride mountain biker known for testing unusual ways to ride, joined fellow riders for a race down a mountain in Sölden, Austria, during Swatch Nines Bike 2026. The competitors rode three-wheeled mountain carts resembling Mario Kart vehicles, navigating alpine terrain, narrow trails and wooden features at speed in a tight pack. A gondola carried them to the summit for the descent. Pilgrim called it the most fun and described the karts as fast and dangerous, which he said is what makes it enjoyable.

Laughing Squid · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

Milan Malpensa: an airport named after a man who ran a whole country in absentia.

Milan's Malpensa Airport takes Berlusconi's name

Milan's Malpensa Airport has been officially renamed Aeroporto Silvio Berlusconi after the four-time prime minister, who died in June 2023. The renaming triggered a petition calling it a 'provocation' and a legal challenge from Milan's city council, which argued the decision bypassed proper procedure. Berlusconi's government had, in 2008, already gotten the airport renamed from Malpensa to 'Malpensa — Silvio Berlusconi' before that was scrapped. It's now permanent, pending the courts.

r/nottheonion · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

the palace says his memory is clouded. his publisher says it's a book.

Princess Diana's brother says Buckingham Palace 'has to gaslight' him

Charles Spencer appeared on CBS Mornings on September 28 to promote his memoir 'Swan Song: Diana, My Sister,' and pushed back on Buckingham Palace's response to his claim that King Charles III told him 'we'll forget her soon enough' about Princess Diana. The Palace said the king is 'mindful that the pain of fraternal grief can cloud reason, affect judgement and colour memory.' Spencer said he told Barbara Walters about the exchange at the time, that only his wife and publisher knew about the book, and that he has since spoken with Princes William and Harry.

CBS News · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

the reviews are in and the market has spoken: one-star location, infinite visibility.

The Internet Marked Flock Safety CEO's Home As A Public Toilet Online

Flock Safety CEO Garrett Langley's home address was relabeled a "public toilet" on Google Maps, and the internet ran with it. Flock makes the license-plate-reading surveillance cameras that privacy advocates have spent years fighting, so the edit reads as retaliation. The listing was reported, briefly restored, and edited again. Langley has not commented on the change.

r/nottheonion · Sep 28, 2026

World

Malaysia cleaned up 8,010 tonnes in one day and still found 89 tonnes of stuff worth keeping. That's a nation that doesn't waste a thing.

272,390 Malaysians, 469 Locations, One Day: 8,010 Tonnes of Trash Gone

On a single day, 272,390 volunteers gathered at 469 locations across Malaysia and collected 8,010 tonnes of waste, sorting out 89 tonnes of recyclables. The nationwide cleanup set two new Malaysia Book of Records marks. Organizers say the effort will be repeated in future years.

r/UpliftingNews · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

9,363 episodes and they still found the one thing nobody asked for.

Margot Robbie's Neighbours Episodes Recut Into AI Vertical Microdrama

RoseBerry Media is recutting Australia's long-running soap Neighbours into vertical micro-episodes for its Epis platform, starting with storylines featuring Margot Robbie as Donna Freedman, cut from her 2008-2011 run into roughly 150 minutes. The edits use RedSnapper, an AI workflow that reformats TV libraries for phones. The show ran about 9,363 episodes from 1985 to 2025, and RoseBerry announced the launch with producer Fremantle.

Variety · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

grandpa lost his savings to a robot. the fix is a robot. it never leaves the phone now.

After a deepfake voice fooled her grandfather, this founder sprang into action

Tarini Padmanabhuni's grandfather lost money in a deepfake call in which a cloned voice of his brother demanded a ransom, and he couldn't tell it was fake. Two years later she founded DetectifAI in San Francisco, which builds small on-device AI models that judge whether a voice is synthetic without sending audio to the cloud. The company is licensing the software to phone makers, betting that deepfake detection becomes a built-in standard feature. The FBI says Americans lost nearly $900 million to AI-driven scams last year, up 24% from 2024.

TechCrunch · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

in Texas, 'the bathroom is occupied' is a structural problem

Texas Man Arrested After Driving Car Into Grocery Store Because He Needed Go To The Bathroom

A man in Texas was arrested after police said he drove his car through the front of a grocery store. Officers reported he told them he did it because he urgently needed to use a restroom. The storefront was damaged and no serious injuries were reported. He now faces charges, and the grocery run did not happen.

BroBible · Sep 28, 2026

Science

elon's really committed to cutting the cord—by putting it in space

Elon Musk attempts to put Starship, the largest spacecraft in history, into orbit

After three and a half years of test flights, SpaceX launched the first operational mission of Starship, the largest spacecraft ever built. The vehicle is carrying 26 Starlink satellites designed to beam mobile internet down from orbit. A successful deployment moves the company closer to a phone-from-space service, and future flights are expected to scale up the satellite count.

El País · Sep 28, 2026

Everything else

Punxsutawney Phil has a better accuracy rate and he's a rodent who lives in a hole.

Map Shows Where America Is Bracing For Heavy Snow This Winter

Meteorologists have released a seasonal outlook map showing which parts of the United States face above-average snowfall this winter, with the heaviest risk concentrated across the northern tier and mountain West. The map is a probabilistic forecast, not a guarantee, and the agency notes that individual storm tracks will determine what actually falls where. Residents in the flagged regions are advised to prepare for a colder, snowier season than last year.

Autoblog · Sep 28, 2026

Tech

'odd' is what you call a warning you plan to monetize.

Nvidia launches AI safety platform after Jensen Huang calls Anthropic, OpenAI warnings 'odd'

Nvidia has released a new software platform designed to monitor and restrain AI agents, pitching it as a safety layer that could have prevented incidents like the recent Hugging Face hack. CEO Jensen Huang had previously dismissed public warnings about AI risk from Anthropic and OpenAI as 'odd', and the rollout lands as regulators and labs alike push for stronger guardrails. The tool runs continuous monitoring on AI agents during operation, per Nvidia's technical blog.

Yahoo Finance · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

A bracket where every seed is a bear named after a river.

Fat Bear Week Narrows to Final Two Days of Voting in Alaska

Fat Bear Week, Katmai National Park's annual bracket-style contest, has reached its final two days of voting. Fans vote online for the brown bear that packed on the most weight before winter hibernation, choosing from contenders like 747, Grazer and Chunk. The park runs the tournament each October as a way to teach the public how fat reserves help bears survive months of denning. Organizers will crown this year's winner after voting closes.

Google News · Sep 28, 2026

Weird

bro was 132 years late and still got the amnesty like the warrant expired

No fine for copy of Century Illustrated returned 132 years late to library

Concord Public Library in New Hampshire ran a yearlong fine amnesty and got back a September 1894 issue of Century Illustrated Monthly Magazine. John Hanson, 84, of nearby Barrington, returned it after seeing the amnesty in the Concord Monitor, saying he never checked it out himself. The overdue fine would have totaled $12,055 over 48,220 days. The library will not recirculate it.

BoingBoing · Sep 28, 2026

Entertainment

a billion dollars and still can't remember him.

Spider-Man: Brand New Day Re-Release Planned With New Footage

Sony confirmed a re-release of 'Spider-Man: Brand New Day' with new footage, though no date or details were revealed. The film, released July 31, has grossed $2.49 billion worldwide and $950.6 million domestically, surpassing 'The Force Awakens' in 47 days. The added run aims to push it past the $1 billion domestic mark, a milestone no movie has reached.

Variety · Sep 28, 2026